


I Need You

by Mischel



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Castiel Takes Care of Dean Winchester, Coda, Crying, Dean Needs A Hug, Destiel - Freeform, Drinking, Episode: s05e22 Swan Song, Hurt, I need you, M/M, Pissed Dean, Sad, Sam dies but not really as you all know, hug, so it's not really major character death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-19
Updated: 2016-05-19
Packaged: 2018-06-09 10:30:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,455
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6902236
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mischel/pseuds/Mischel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean is sad and angry and he doesn't want anyone, he just wants to be left alone and so he drives away. Now it's up to Castiel to find him and take care of him when Dean needs him the most, after losing his brother.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Need You

It's quiet. So quite it's deafening. Michael and Lucifer are both gone and the pit has closed with Sam and my brothers, possibly forever. I look around and for a second I wonder how am I alive again. But then I see Bobby, lying on the ground.

He's dead.

I tilt my head to one side a little and look at his face. His neck's been snapped not a long ago, probably by Lucifer, the former archangel. I kneel beside him and want to bring him back to life, when I suddenly hear someone crawling on the ground.

I stand up again and turn around, and then I see him. Dean Winchester, the supposedly righteous man is kneeling beside the place where the pit had been opened. The last place where his younger brother was standing before he jumped. There are four rings in his hand, still glowing and Dean is looking down, his shoulders slouched.

I slowly approach him and he looks up at me. His face is covered in blood, and his nose is broken. His left eye is closed and swollen and his lips are ripped, streams of blood red on his cheeks.

"Cas, you're alive?" He asks, his voice weak.

"I'm better than that," I answer and touch his forehead with my two fingers. In the next second he's healed and there is no more blood. Only his bright green eyes are looking back at me, confused.

He looks down again and then he looks into my eyes, slowly standing up. He doesn't look away when he stands in front of me and stares at me. "Cas, are you God?" He asks.

"It's a nice compliment, but no." The smile on my face is just tiny. He looks down for a second, the sun making his sad green eyes sparkle. "Although I believe he brought be back." I turn around. "New and improved." I go to the motionless body on the ground – Bobby Singer. He helped me a few times and he means a lot to Dean. Bobby was and will be a good man again.

I kneel beside him and touch his temple with my two fingers. He opens his eyes and takes a deep breath, sitting up and looking up at me. I nod my head and he nods back. Then I stand up again and go back to Dean.

He's holding the four rings in his hand, looking at Bobby and then at the rings again. There is sadness in his face, a great grief. But there's also something else, something that means that he's given up and lost all hope. Every fiber he's got wants to die and save Sam, but he knows he can't. He doesn't want to let himself show weakness, show emotions, but that's just the way he is, I suppose.

I stop in front of him and notice something glistening on his face. He is crying after all, but I could have expected that. He's just lost his own brother and he might not get him back. It took a lot of angels to pull Dean out of hell. Sam is locked in Lucifer's cage and it would be even harder to get him out of there. Besides, heaven won't ever be the same. After Michael and Lucifer gone, there is only Raphael left. Raphael and _me_.

I look at Dean again, but he doesn't look back. I reach my hand and gently touch his shoulder. I can already feel the tension in his body. "Do you need my assistance?" I ask him. I just want to help him.

He closes his eyes and tightens his grip on the rings in his palm. His expression suddenly hardens and he doesn't look into my eyes as he answers. "No, Cas."

"Are you sur-"

"Leave me alone." He turns around and goes to his black car. He starts the engine and carefully lays the rings in front of him, behind the steering wheel. Then he turns the car around and drives away. I stare at his disappearing silhouette.

"You should go to him." Bobby says as he walks to me.

"But Dean doesn't want me to." I say, looking puzzled. "He's angry." Bobby takes deep breath and looks behind him, at the grass where the ground had opened and closed.

"Dean might think he's alright," he says and looks back at me. "But I know the boy. Eventually he _will_ break down, and I don't want him to be alone while it happens." I keep staring into his eyes, thinking about what he said.

"Do you think he'll mind?"

"Oh he will," Bobby smiles sadly. "But then he'll appreciate it. We all need to accept help sometime."

"You're a wise man." I tell him. He nods and then I disappear and leave him alone. I spread my wings and hover above the ground for a few seconds. Then I take a deep breath and fly higher, and higher, trying to spot Dean's car on the road.

And then I see him. The black car, enlightened by the bright sun, driving farther and farther away from me. There's a broken driver behind the wheel, and I have to try to fix that. I fly closer and stay above the car, still invisible to the sad man inside.

Dean drives faster and faster and he drives a long time. But then he suddenly stops and when I look inside, his hands are clenched around the steering wheel and his jaw is tensed. His eyes are shut tight and then he relaxes, laying his head on the steering wheel and taking deep breaths. I look down, I don't want him to suffer like this, but I know he's mourning for his brother.

I look up again and notice that Dean isn't in the car anymore. He's outside, leaning against the hood and taking a beer to his lips. He takes a sip and then breathes in and out, closing his eyes again.

A tear rolls down his cheek and then he loses it. A few silent sobs escape him and that's when I make myself visible again. "Dean." I say quietly, and he jumps.

"Dammit Cas!" He yells. "I told you to leave me alone." He wipes the tears away with his sleeve and takes another sip.

"I know, but I can't do that Dean." I answer and offer a comforting hand on his shoulder. He doesn't shake it away. "I... I assume you need comforting after the lost of your bro-"

"Don't give me that bullshit, Cas!" Dean looks at me and finally shakes my hand off of his shoulder. "I don't need it!" He says as a tear escapes him. "I don't need you or anyone, understood? And do I feel like shit after losing him? Hell yes, but I don't see a reason why should _you_ care!" He yells.

"Dean-"

"No, Cas. No, I just _lost_ my brother, okay? And I want to get him back, but he's in the fucking Hell and he _doesn't_ belong there! It should've been me, not him! H-he doesn't, he... he's my little brother..." Dean says as he lets the beer fall from his hand and hangs his head down, closing his eyes. "H-he..." His lips are trembling as he takes a shaky breath, then he falls on his knees, defeated.

I step closer to him and kneel, putting my hand on his shoulder again. "Dean," I say quietly and when he doesn't respond, I take that as an approval and slowly put my arms around him, awkwardly trying to offer him my shoulder to cry on. For a moment he stays still, just looking down and shaking, but then a sob escapes him and he puts his arms around me, clinging on to my trenchcoat with his face buried in my chest.

"C-cas..." He whispers. "I... I lost him."

"I am aware," I tell him. "But I will do everything that I can to help you get him back." I feel him nodding, tightening his hold on me. He starts sobbing quietly and I let my chin rest on the top of his head, hugging him back and wrapping my wings protectively around him. It's the least I can do.

I don't know if we'll ever get Sam back or if it's even possible. But I will keep my promise - I will do everything in my power to get him back and to make Dean smile again. Because this human being, crying in my arms... he's special and he's gone through more things than I can ever know, even though I've known him for so long.

He will always keep fighting and he will never give up either.

**Author's Note:**

> I feel like this sucks a lot, but I hope you liked it at least a bit :)  
> Btw have you already seen 11x22???? I'm still freaking out about it D:


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